Hello everybody, let’s chat ovre tea about…how I was driving home from taking Katarina to school and I was thinking about how long it has been since I had posted on my blogs…why I asked myself and it came to me like a flash of lightning, that fills the sky with it’s illuminating light, that it can light up the darkness like a giant floor lamp; I have too much “noise” in my life, too much “noise” filling up my days: the tv that has to be on constantly, facebook games, I have to check my social media sites but I can get caught up in them chasing this quiz or that news post, watching Netflix to keep up with the latest show that everyone tells me I have to watch this and why? Because I realized that when it’s quiet I can write, I can read but what scares me the most is that when it’s quiet I can hear God’s voice…I have been beseeching God to speak to me, to tell me what He wants me to do but how can He speak if I’m drowning Him out with all the white noise…It only in the quiet moments when everything is still that can finally hear His voice.
So I made a commitment today that i will shut out the noise to spend time with my Heavenly Father, to read my latest book on my reading list, to write on my blog of the day and to just be still. I have always felt the need to have noise in my life, I do love music, but God showed me yesterday that all the noise shuts out the opportunity to hear His voice, to hear the birds sing, to hear the sound of the wind and to just hear the silence…but it was also a way to shut out the angry noise that was my childhood and adolescence, to shut out the screaming voices, the sound of my tears after receiving a beating, whether it be verbal or physical, and the noise that was the pain and bruises on my brother and sister and myself.
What God showed me as I am writing this and throughout all the moments of healing and breakthrough is that I am not that little girl anymore, I am a mom and a wife whose family needs me, I am healing and being set free from the chaos and turmoil that was my childhood and I have a story to tell that I can’t share if I’m always surrounding myself with noise. So let the quiet come, let the peace fill my home, spirit and mind and just be still.